Daily Prompt: Zoo


“The thing is, and I do promise this, we weren’t drunk. If we had been drunk, we would have been a hell of a lot more agreeable about the whole thing. Or, I would have been.

It made sense, in theory. ‘Adults night out at the zoo!!!!’. I thought, great! I can look at animals and get drunk at the same time. Whizzer.

Only the drinks were $8 for a spits worth of hard liquor, and it was full of people who have apparently pre-gamed. Which was annoying because then we realized that we could have and should have pre-gamed.

The worst part was that the most interesting animal there was one that I’ve eaten, and kangaroos are boring as hell to watch anyway, especially when there’s 30 of them and they’re mostly dumb babies.

And then, when we were finally smart enough to leave, it cost us $30 bucks to get back to the cool side of town for strong drinks and decent food. So yeah, fu-”

“MA’AM! So you won’t be making a holiday donation to the Minnesota Zoo?”


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